This was the six year mark as guild leader, but the sixteen year mark as husband.
“my sixteenth year as a husband” (You used “six year mark” twice in a row, very close together)
Neglecting her to ensure the guild stayed focused through 40-Man raids was poor judgement on my part; very representative of life decisions thus far.
"I had neglected her to ensure the guild stayed focused on 40 man raids, which was poor judgement on my part, but very representative of my life decisions so far.
"I was bona fide “Husband of the Year” material.
since she made it her career.
“She had made it her career, after all.”
“Oh, I get it. Like domestic abuse or theft…”
“Yeah! The demographics change based off of type of crime.”
It’s unclear who’s speaking here. You need an “I said”. Also, you should have “based off of THE type of crime.”
This is indeed “judgment”. You’ll want to change all instances of this error. “Judgement” is the British spelling, so it’s technically not wrong in that context, but we are not British, so it looks like a typo and like you can’t spell correctly. (Which we know you can).
but it is very much the read that determines who gets another chance.
I’m not sure what “it’s very much the read” means.