The Grand Allusion


#1

[To: Vexx] lol. This is only the first night!

[From: Vexx] Don’t understand why people are having such a tough time with tornadoes. It’s so easy!!!

[To: Vexx] This is nothing. We used to spend weeks on a boss.

[From: Vexx] This feels like weeks.


Outline for Patch 4.0
#2

Even a shill would be better than this apathy.

Not sure what you are going for here. A shill is a person but were speaking about the clerks demeanor and comparing it to “apathy.” Since you are trying to go for the shill attitude change it to “feigned enthusiasm would be better than this apathy”

the kids were up on all night playing this one

Remove “on”


#3

i’d leave out the "for reasons i’m about to make clear."
doesn’t seem to fit.