Revised Post: Wise Decisions

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2.42 - http://eightyearsinazeroth.blogspot.com/2013/03/2-42.html

sore-spot

I don’t think this needs to be hyphenated.

asked–a

Spacing on the em dash.

How did measure up against Goldy

“How did she measure up…”

What was schedule for the next raid?

What was the schedule…"

that Blain could give his approval to.

Change “to” to “on”.

A-Team / B-Team run.

Spacing on the forward slash.

In proving herself within such a short period, she met all the requirements for a role of this responsibility. And, as expected, she dove in head first.

This could be one sentence.

First on the “do-not-care” list was Dalans.

I’m always first on the Do Not Care list baby.

This began to drive a new behavior my raid team picked up, which was to silently /ignore other raiders

Remove “picked up”

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Hmm, that makes the sentence read:

This began to drive a new behavior my raid team, which was to silently…

I believe we’ve made it works. Perhaps “of” my raid team?

All other edits rolled up.

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I did another pass on this. It still needed serious cleanup. Re-review as time allows. Thanks!

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Yeah dunno what I was thinking with the “picked up” edit, it was late probably. Maybe: ‘This began to drive a new behavior in my raid team, which was to silently’