Revised Post: Back on Tracks

2.24 -

“Howabout…half that time, then?”

Space between “how” and “about”


In the article the “n” isn’t italicized.

the thread of a healer

“thread” to “threat”

and he dragged the colossal Elemental shift back towards the beams.

Remove “shift” or maybe add “to” after “Elemental”? Not sure what you were going for.

Kurst now had control of the Hydross, and began taking stacks of Frost damage while Ater recovered.

Of the Hydross eh? He’s not so important! Remove “the”.

There was no brute force here, all movements, all attacks, every single heal were measured.

Not sure what the rule is for having a plural subjects mixed with single subjects and then a plural verb such as “were”. It isn’t a huge deal either way.

As Hyross’s health

You don’t need the extra “s” since Hydross ends in an “s” you just need the apostrophe.

Perhaps a bit of Blain was the bit that pushed us over the edge

A bit redundant (Ha ha!). “Perhaps a bit of Blain was what pushed us over the edge…”

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Got all these edits in, plus added a great piece of artwork to the top of the post that fits the opening part well (imho).