One month remained before the launch of Cataclysm, and the guild was hungry for that which lay just out of reach. Achievements remained incomplete, and a calculated movement quickly grew among the ranks to solve for x. I had the good fortune of being looped in on many of these invites, and ramped up my availability to meet the needs of the guild. We kicked things off in haste on Hallowe’en night, returning to Ulduar after nearly a year of uninterrupted raiding in Icecrown. The mission: face the Old God once again, sans assistance from the four Keepers.
We kicked things off in haste on Hallowe’en night
Is that how they spell Halloween in Canada or are you just trying to sneak a comma in as an apostrophe cuz you like them so much?
Zedman unrelented.
Zedman was unrelenting.
a grisly death as the base
Change “as” to “at”
There were other changes, true.
Sounds better if you change “true” to “also”, YMMV.
But, my dealing damage would not make or break this fine
I have no idea what’s going on in this sentence; clarify?
and consider that a real achievement
Since the first part of the sentence already has SVO (We defeated Algalon), this second bit is missing something. “…and I consider that a real achievement” perhaps?
Either is acceptable, per the wiki – I’ve always spelled it with an apostrophe. British 
My dealing damage would not make or break this fight…
My ability to deal damage would not make or break this fight…
A tank doing competitive damage would not make or break this fight…
All others rolled up.
Ah, it said “fine” when you meant “fight” that’s where I got caught up.