For the lazy
So a guy is running along the beach when he notices a woman with no arms and no legs, crying. He stops and asks her,
"What's wrong?" To which she replied,
I see all these couples together every day, and I've never been hugged before.
So the man hugs her and walks away.
The next day, he runs along the same beach and sees the same woman crying.
"What's wrong this time?" He says.
Well, I've never been kissed before.
So he kisses her and runs off.
The third day, he sees her on his run again, and she is crying.
"What's wrong? " he says.
"Well, this might be a bit much, but I've never been fucked before" she replied.
"Well that's not a problem at all" he says.
So he picks. her up by the torso and throws her into the ocean.
Well you're fucked now!